My friend, Melissa

Remember, we all arrived home on Monday night from our trips......Kevin to Minnesota and the girls and I to see family. Well, on Tuesday evening, my phone rang after 10pm and I saw that it was my dear friend, Melissa. I immediately knew that something wasn't right.......we talk often, but never that late at night. I answered to hear the panicked voice of my friend, who told me that her husband was missing. He had hiked to the top of Stone Mountain to study, and Melissa hadn't heard from him since about 5pm that afternoon.

The night ended up being never-ending for Melissa....and very long for me, her friend, who was wishing that I could be in Atlanta beside her. After many hours of waiting on my end and searching in Atlanta, I received one of the most heartbreaking phone calls of my entire life. About 10am on Wednesday morning, Melissa called me from the holding room that she was in to tell me that Tony's body had been found and that he had fallen to his death.

I feel like that I should stop right here and give some of you a little more "perspective" on our relationship. Melissa and I have known each other since the 2nd grade. We grew up together and then were college roommates. We've seen each other through many moments in life and have reached the point in our friendship where our love for each other is not bound by circumstance or condition. There is no question as to whether the other will "be there".......it's just given that we will be! The comfort level that we share with each other is uncommon in this earthly lifetime among friends. Kevin and I chose to name our oldest daughter after Melissa........someone whom we knew was a woman after God's own heart and someone that would be an example to our girls of Biblical womanhood.........Chloe's middle name is, Melissa.

So having this background of our sisterhood, you should understand a little better how this phone call rocked my world and rattled me like very few things in life do. Knowing what my friend was enduring was almost more than I could bear that day. I remember that I was glued to my phone.....as anyone who knew us wanted to know what had happened and how they could help. I also remember that the last thing I told Melissa before I hung up with her that fateful morning was that I would be there.....as soon as I could.

I did go to Atlanta the next day (Thursday) and several more times in that week. Melissa planned a service in Tony's memory for the Sunday after his death. The service was perfect........and there were hundreds of people, literally hundreds, that came to show Melissa their support and recount their favorite memory of Tony. Our God granted Melissa so much grace that day. She and I prayed right before the visitation started that God would give her grace to stand.....and boy did He deliver!

And actually, Melissa and I talk about that on a daily basis......about how our God is so faithful and will supply our needs. That's right, we talk on the phone daily. And most days we marvel at how God is giving Melissa the strength to wake up and go on.

So........maybe this gives you some insight into my blogging break and where I've been over the past couple of months. If there is one thing that I learned from Tony and the short time I knew him, it was to be intentional. I want to be more intentional in my relationships. Because I've also learned that we are not guaranteed tomorrow.......I've always heard that, but I've experienced it on a much deeper level over the past couple of months.

I don't know that I'll ever be able to exactly put into words what this experience has been like from my end......all of the different emotions that I've felt as I have tried to navigate this deep journey of grief with my friend. As I wrote this tonight, I couldn't help but think of the story in Exodus of Moses and Aaron and the defeat of the Amalekites. As long as Moses held up his hands, the Israelites were winning. When Moses' arms became tired, Aaron and Hur held up his arms so that his hands remained steady until sunset. The Israelites overcame the Amalekites and Moses built an altar and called it "The Lord is my Banner......for hands were lifted up to the throne of the Lord." (Exodus 17:15-16)

Now, I know that the scenario is a little different, but be assured that my friend, Melissa, is in a huge battle and some days her hands will get tired of lifting to the Throne. But, I have the great honor and privilege of holding my sweet friend's arms up when she gets tired. And that I will do......I will hold them as long as she needs me to. And as the days go on, she will win the battle that she's waging. And will build an alter to remember that the Lord is her banner (even in the darkest times) and that her hands are still lifted up to the throne of the Lord!